This Week not in the Office II

Good evening. Continuing the theme, as it were, of me not being in the office this week or indeed for the next five weeks to come, I thought that in the true spirit of the summer I would devote this episode in its entirity to....er.....(thinks quickly, sound of anchient motor stirring into life) (don’t know if its grammatically correct to put two sets of brackets, but sod the rules, its a free web, isn’t it? Actually I have to pay. Anyhoo, this bracket was for the benefit of Fat, for whom I would like to say that the image represented above was of my mind stirring into life, not anything else. Just so U know....)......I’m awfully sorry old chap, what with all those brackets, what, I forgot, what, what, quite what, what I was saying (what).

Oops. My brain seems to be somewhat devoid of all function today. Anyway, where was I? Oh yes, I was saying that I would devote this episode in its entirity to....er.....(webmaster appears from no where and writes in large red board marker pen on Bigal’s forehead "YOU’RE FIRED" before handing him the bill for the numerous cups of coffee consumed by aforementioned acticlist at the webmasters house)......the joys of carp. Yeah, thats right, ha ha, I knew what I was gonna write about all this time and I didn’t tell you. (Bigal falls off his chair into the pile of assorted rubbish, including newspapers, post-it notes in varying attractive shades of yellow, mouldy sandwiches in varying attractive shades of green, and a large rainbow trout, in attractive shades of rainbow, evidently thrown in a fit of excitement at some point, that has wandered, perhaps like a small stream in the....boys toilets at school, out of the bin to his left and onto the floor. Which is, I hear, directly below one when one is obeying the rules of gravity like one should. Not that one shouldn’t feel free not to if one feels the need to float in mid-air. After all, preventing people from floating when they want to is like Vesten "Porn King" Tit-Hewl. that is to say, perverted. One might say "Floatist", even.)

Elsewhere not in the office this week:

As you can see, being intelligent educated folks as you are (that does not mean you, Fat) there is an overwhelming theme of nothing happening, or rather having happened, this week.

Till the time upon which you next deign to entrance us with you’re unified presence,

Stay sane (hey, its more than I can do),

Al Le-Big


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